Let go!

Let go!

The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.
Steve Maraboli


“You need to let go of the anger,” I said to my best friend who’s dealing with the end of love.


“I know, but I’m finding it difficult especially when the anger and disappointment hit like tsunamis, at the most inappropriate moments.”


“You need to let it all go,” I repeated, “just like he let you go so easily.”


“Ouch! It’s easier said than done, and I know what to do but it just doesn’t seem to be working.”


“It’ll take time. It’s like a death – it’s like losing Sarah, we’ll never get over losing her completely but the time passed has made it easier to deal with.”


“I suppose… but she and I weren’t close in the end. That’s what I can’t get over.”


“You’ve been through a lot, and you need to go easy on yourself. You are not a machine. Understand why you’re going through the emotions you’re going through. Celebrate the good times that you and he shared together, but let go of the bad. You loved him. Remember that. He’s let you go for a reason. Imagine what’s around the corner. Why not try out Internet dating again?”


“So soon?” She paused, contemplates the idea. “I suppose it will take my mind off everything. And I did meet some great men before when I tried it here 10 years ago.”


“It’s never too soon after you’ve successfully let go. So you need to let go. There’s no point in hanging on to the anger. It will cripple you and it will stop you meeting a man that doesn’t need to ever let you go.”


“At least I’ve learned a valuable lesson – to trust my gut and walk away the moment a doubt creeps in.”


“Referring to his age, aren’t you? Right in the beginning…”


“Please – I know that everyone warned me. Even I bloody well warned myself, and that’s what I’m mostly angry about. I am angry with myself for letting me down in this way. It’s as though I’ve taken 6 steps back. After I gave up alcohol it felt as though I’d taken 10 steps forward… and then this. Almost 2 years wasted. There were just so many signs! And I ignored them.”


“This is precisely when you need to go easy on yourself. Nothing’s ever a waste. You’ve just said you’ve learned from it. You’ll never date a man more than, what? 5 years older than you from this moment forward? And one that hasn’t had kids or at least wants more while he’s still young.”


“Absolutely!” She smiled for the first time since we started chatting. “I now believe I’ve been set free to meet someone that’s more of a kindred spirit that desires life and everything from it as much as me. He simply wasn’t that man…”


“That’s it! You’re now free to choose any man you desire and you know you can have anyone you want.”


“The problem is I’ve just got to want one or two… Hopefully, I don’t pick the wrong one like I did in South Africa.”


“But you only knew that after your relationship ended. A pity the other was too hurt by you not choosing him.”


“Hindsight bloody staggeringly annoys me!”


We both laughed.




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